{"id":532,"date":"2024-02-10T13:44:13","date_gmt":"2024-02-10T13:44:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/?p=532"},"modified":"2026-01-05T13:35:38","modified_gmt":"2026-01-05T13:35:38","slug":"the-man-in-the-forest-creepy-content","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/the-man-in-the-forest-creepy-content\/","title":{"rendered":"The man in the forest (Creepy Content)"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I found myself in a forest deep in Surrey. Not my usual Birmingham to industrial estate run. This was a proper job off the beaten track, a delivery to a private residence down a lane that seemed to forget what tarmac was.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That’s when I saw him. A man, just standing among the trees. He was perfectly still. Not moving at all. He hadn’t noticed me. He was frozen. As my son would say, \u201che\u2019s in the \u2018pause\u2019 menu.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My brain, never helpful in these situations, started running through the possibilities. What is he doing? Maybe he\u2019s having a moment of creepy reflection in the forest. What if he\u2019s not real? What if he\u2019s that forest demon guy folk talk about online? Y\u2019know the one that attacks people. No problem, I\u2019ll do kung fu on him. Crap, I don\u2019t even know kung fu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He did smell a little. I could smell him from here. A damp, earthy, organic smell. Like a dead guy in a forest. Or maybe just a guy who really, really<\/em> liked the forest.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Breaking the Silence<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

I had to get to the car park. I called out to him. \u201cHi?\u201d
Nothing. Not a single response. Not a twitch.
\u201cSorry, do you know which way the car park is?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then, he moved. He slowly turned around. His movements were choppy, stiff. Maybe this was one of them \u2018matrix\u2019 moments the internet talks about, where the simulation lags.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cYes,\u201d he said, his voice surprisingly normal. \u201cFollow this path and take the first left and you\u2019ll see it.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Unexpected Rant<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

This guy was nice as pie. Helpful, even. And then he started ranting. About the government. About how taxation is theft. I just nodded in agreement, the universal signal for \u2018please don\u2019t sacrifice me to the woodland gods.\u2019 He had an overall rough appearance, like he lived in the forest itself. His clothes were layers of well-worn fabrics, perfectly camouflaged against the bark and leaves.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After a brief chat where I learned more about his libertarian views than I ever needed, I took his advice and walked away, heading for the supposed car park. A few steps down the path, a chill\u2014sillier than the autumn air\u2014made me turn around.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The guy was gone. Just like that. No sound of footsteps, no rustle. He\u2019d vanished into the quiet of the woods as if he\u2019d never been there. Spooky, eh?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Courier’s Reality Check<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sitting back in the van, engine running, the oddness of it settled. This is the unscripted bit of the job you don’t get on a motorway. One delivery takes you to a forest in Surrey where you get directions from a possibly-supernatural political commentator. The next will be to a shiny office in Solihull.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It highlights the adaptability you need. You’re not just navigating postcodes. You’re navigating situations. Finding addresses down hidden lanes, dealing with unexpected characters, and still getting the package to the door with a (slightly wary) smile. Whether it’s a corporate park or the edge of a woodland, the job gets done. The story, however, is a bonus.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Need something delivered somewhere\u2026 anywhere? I\u2019ll find it. Even if I have to ask for directions first.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

#courier #sameday #logistics<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So, do you need an easily spooked by strange forest people courier? You should otherwise spooky forest guy will slide in your dms!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Click on www.frigate-express.co.uk<\/a> and use the calculator to quote you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you have any questions???? Get in touch.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

What if he\u2019s not real! What if he\u2019s that forest demon guy folk talk about? Y\u2019know the one that attacks people. No problem, I\u2019ll do kung fu on him. Crap, I don\u2019t even know kung fu.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":533,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"default","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[32],"tags":[18,20,23],"class_list":["post-532","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-general-moans","tag-courier","tag-logistics-2","tag-travel"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/532","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=532"}],"version-history":[{"count":3,"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/532\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1327,"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/532\/revisions\/1327"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/533"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=532"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=532"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/frigate-express.co.uk\/ourblogs\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=532"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}